Adventure, Barnaby!

Well, after numerous attempts of trying to push a true companion away, it looks like the winds will be taking us West to BC possibly, pending a job offer for him.

I’m both excited and nervous because I swore I would never fall in love again, much less get up and move to bigger and better places.

But change is funny that way. You crave it for half a decade and when the opportunity presents itself, we can lay frozen in fear.

Courage is not the absence of fear, but the bravery to act in spite of it.

Perhaps it could all come crumbling down tomorrow, but I will stand holding onto my trust in God wherever we may go.

Ameen.

P.S. Prayers for a successful transition and ease with finances for this hefty change!

This entry was posted on April 25, 2016. 3 Comments

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Because You Loved Me, Celine Dion

Jan 16 2016

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Win by Brian McKnight

PPPS: Sheepishly I must add that one would say buckets and buckets of affection for you that are even more than you think you deserve, but you deserve to be spoiled anyways. 🙂 MashAllah. Ameen.

Interest Vs Commitment

“There’s a difference between interest and commitment. When you’re interested in doing something, you do it only when it’s convenient. When you’re committed to something, you accept no excuses; only results.” Kenneth Blanchard

Inspired by Evan’s post http://thebettermanprojects.com/2015/08/28/interest-vs-commitment/, it dawned on me that while someone may show interest in me, this does not always determine commitment.

It explains why people fall off the map.

Why interest lost is confused with commitment withheld.

Sure, most start with an interest before it leads to commitment, but such laissez-faire attitudes are what heartbreak make when we give others a greater power to make us happy than we do for ourselves.

I’m committed to my self-care, ensuring I’m well treated, and removing barriers to self-respect. I’m not interested in anything less than worthy. It’s time to listen to myself, and pay attention when tracks are derailed. It means its time to set things straight.

Guidance.

Ameen.

This entry was posted on September 1, 2015. 4 Comments

What Is One Thing You Hope Happens In Your Lifetime?

One of the benefits of getting to know people, online or in person is that you never know what lessons you are given, and new things you learn about yourself.

Today, someone I have been chatting with in a friendly and respectful way (yes, this is rare for online dating), asked the question: “What is one thing you hope happens in your life time”

I was stunned at how profound this question is amongst the many he has asked as I discover more about myself. My reply was the following:

“Your last question is really good.. not sure if I can admit it to myself what I really hope for in my lifetime as it seems too scary to say. But if I were to be honest, I guess to live without fear of tomorrow. Live as if I’ve never known anything but happiness. And to fall in love with myself everyday, even if sometimes there’s no one beside me to remind me of how awesome I really am.”

And yes, tears roll down my cheeks as I also wanted to add but didn’t, I really want to fall in love with someone who is like the love of my life, and to die happily. But I thought that would be too cheesy so decided to keep it light. Learning to hold myself back while also being vulnerable is the toughest balance in dating and meeting new people. Keeping my feelings in check while also letting myself feel something is like the greatest paradox.

But I have faith, with all the wonderful lessons I have learned and missteps I have taken, I will dance my way into my new song.

Ameen.

What Dating Has Taught Me

1. You can only receive what you give to yourself. If you don’t date yourself, you really can’t expect others to give you what you deserve. You must do this for yourself.

2. Never, ever, settle for less than what you’re worth. You will only discover your worth when you know your value. You will only know your value when you start appreciating how much you have to offer. You will only know what you have to offer when you start acknowledging to yourself all the wonderful qualities about you that make you who you are.

3. Do not apologize for your feelings. They are valid. Even if they don’t make sense, they often do later on in the form of intuition.

4. Leave someone who makes you feel small even just by a millimetre because he will end up leaving you short.

5. Do not take yourself for granted. Yes, he could have chosen someone else, but your gift is your very presence.

6. If he ever puts you down, you will feel it. It may not be his sweet words, it can be the tiniest glimpse into his soul projecting his insecurities. You are not here to receive such treatment. You deserve to be given to.

7. Being pushed around is not just physical, it can be verbally too in the form of suggestions, silent disapprovals or lack of enthusiasm for your fabulous short haircut.

8. Dating is all about you. It was never about them. Its always been about how much you love yourself to let go of something that isn’t working, and how vulnerably will you open up to the amazing possibilities before you.

9. We settle for the love we think we deserve. So stop settling. Start dreaming, BIG. Your life will only take you as far as you imagine yourself to be.

10. Lastly, no matter how swept away your heart is, please take your brain with you. Our intuition knows deep down inside, that silent voice that nudges us to do what is right for ourselves even if it’s not approved by anyone else.

Much love to you all.